There's One God and Her Name is Caffeine (lyrics - folk version)

Is there anything finer
than when the waitress doesn't charge for coffee?

Oh, what a blessing for breakfast at the diner when we please!

Ain't nothing more American than eggs & bacon,

if ya hold the beans,

but I'll take 'em if you press 'em

'cause I bleed and guzzle oil & gasoline.

There's one god and Her name's Caffeine.

With my hand on a bible,

I'd swear against the church, the state, and borders.

"Oh, what a blessing for men of cloth & cartography!"

Ain't nothing more dividing than the lines they're defining

between you and me,

but I don't look up to the sky for an answer,
I look into a mug - and what do I see?

There's one god and Her name's Caffeine.

Dark as wood or saccharine.

Just one sip and I'm serene,

or fired up like kerosene.

No I don't wanna go to heaven

even if I got the means.

There's one god and Her name's Caffeine.

All hail the bean.

There's one god, her name's Caffeine.

All hail the bean.

Praise be, caffeine.

You might call me a whiner

if I'm asking for a bit of reason.

Oh, what a blessing we can dance along the wire when we please!

Ain't nothing more American than guns and arson,

blood, oil, and gasoline.

But I'm not looking to the sky for a savior,

I look into my mug, and what do I see?

There's one god and Her name's Caffeine.

Dark as wood or saccharine.

Just one sip and I'm serene,

or fired up like kerosene.

No I don't wanna go to heaven

even if I got the means.

Go on, tell St. Peter, don't wait up for me.

There's one god and Her name's Caffeine.

Praise be, caffeine.

Praise be, caffeine.

Praise be, caffeine.